Buckeye Talk, Nick Swisher, and the “Vikings Family”: While We’re Waiting…
November 19, 2014ESPN back on East 4th Street for Cavaliers-Spurs game
November 19, 2014It’s late Saturday night. The Browns play the Houston Texans tomorrow at one at FirstEnergy Stadium. They’re in first place. They have a shot at going seven and freaking three.
I’m going the game. It’s going to be cold. I’m getting my gear ready. I just tried on the coat that I’m going to wear. I had never worn it before. I chose this coat for a couple reasons. Most important, it’s orange. Less important, it’s warm.
It is a Super Duper coat, Super Duper being a chain of grocery stores in New York, Pennsylvania, and Ohio. It’s not around anymore. I know this because my grandpa—who I called Grandpa—had a Super Duper store in Buffalo, New York, where he and Grandma lived.
I try the coat on. It fits just right. It’s water-resistant. It’s up to the task of battling a Lake Erie wind. I can fit five layers under it, easy. If it lived through Buffalo winters, it’s definitely built for Cleveland.
I reach into the coat pockets. I pull out two Browns ticket stubs, a business card for Nathan’s Automotive Detailing, a toothpick wrapper, and a Band-Aid. There isn’t a date on the tickets, but the Celebrities/3WE Great Continental Kickoff Contest coupons on the back expired on January 31, 1991. The last time this coat was worn, it went to a Browns game.
My dad wore this coat. I know this because Dad is the sort of person who would save ticket stubs, hold onto a detailer’s card, keep a toothpick handy, and also bring a Band-Aid, just in case.
Dad wore this coat to a cold Browns game. Now, I’m going to wear it to a cold Browns game.
This coat is Browns fandom. It explains it better and more simply than any book or documentary could. Unwittingly, this coat has brought me closer to understanding exactly what it means to be a Browns fan, or at least what it means to me.
I root for the Browns just as my dad roots for the Browns, and I do it because my dad does it.
If you cheer for the Cleveland Browns because your parents cheered for the Browns—and you almost certainly do; people don’t choose this life—then you are doing so out of love for your parents. It’s true. If you’re like me, then it’s especially because you love your dad.
When you’re little, and especially if you’re a male,1 your dad is your hero.
Hero. Think about what that word means.
When you’re little, your dad can do literally anything. Anything in the world. You’ve seen him change a light bulb, so of course he can build a spaceship. If he can lift a gallon of milk with one hand without grunting, then he can probably hoist a Cadillac clean overhead.
He’s brave, too. He can endure papercuts and touch hot grills. He can catch a mouse in the basement with his bare hands. He can walk across the street at night and not be scared. When you see him walking like that, you walk a little taller, too.
And if your dad—your hero—is a Cleveland Browns fan, then by god, you’re a Cleveland Browns fan.
You accept as gospel that the Browns are the only football team to root for, and the only one that you would want to root for. You might respect the Green Bay Packers or the San Francisco 49ers, but you’d never be a fan of theirs. You sympathize with supporters of the Buffalo Bills. Of course you hate the damn Steelers, especially because they win so damn much.
These are the axioms I was raised on, and if you’ve read this far, then you were probably raised on them too.
That is what being a Browns fan really is. It’s not spending money on merchandise or wearing the team colors or even going to the games. It’s having the team be a touchstone for your identity. It’s having the team shape your formative years. It’s having the team inform your values and ideals, things like loyalty and commitment and respect. It’s having the team be a part of who you are.
It’s rooting for the team because your old man rooted for the team.
You may not listen to the same music as your dad. You may not vote the same way he does. You may have moments of profound disagreement. And that’s all okay. That’s all normal. Part of growing up is being into different things than your folks. It’s natural to like and value different things than your parents, and it’s natural to like them precisely because they are different than what your parents like.
But the Cleveland Browns are largely exempt from this, and that’s special. You like the Browns when you’re young, and you like them when you’re old. The Browns are the rare institution that survives puberty.
They are a bridge to your youth, to the days when your parents did everything they could to give you the perfect world, the days before you realized that the world wasn’t perfect. The Browns are a time machine that takes you back to making diving catches into leaf piles at halftime. They remind you of your older brother dressing up like Bernie Kosar for Halloween circa 1989. They remind you of your dad and your grandpa. They remind you of your family.
That’s what the Browns are to me, anyway. I suppose everyone has their own interpretation, and that’s special, too. That’s what makes sports so cool. Everyone loves them, and everyone loves them a little differently.
And you never know what will make you realize it.
- I can’t speak for the female experience, as much as I’d love to understand it. [↩]
14 Comments
Will, that is a fantastic article. I loved every word of it. And it made me think about my Dad, who died a few years ago. He gave my brothers and me the gift of the Browns and Indians (and even my sisters got interested in them eventually). He was a better man than me in just about every way imaginable. But I keep trying. I think I’ll start wearing his old Tribe windbreaker.
Thank you, and amen.
What a nice piece of writing.
Great, great work, Will.
I don’t get it! Just playin’ great job.
This is great, Will. Being a Browns fan but not having a great relationship with my father, or much of one at all, makes me think that I must truly be crazy for choosing this lot. I’m envious (not in a 7 deadly sins way) of this connection that you have with your dad. My hope is that I can start this inherited tradition of hope and misery by passing it down to my son. Thanks for this wonderful perspective.
My wife frequently asks me why I’m still a Browns fans after so many years since my family left Cleveland.
It’s not something that you shake.
Thanks Dad.
Beautifully written.
Great piece. I can relate – I inherited a beautiful browns bomber jacket that was my uncle’s. He died before I was born, but we share orange and brown blood. To think that jacket went to see the Kardiac Kids before I was born is pretty cool.
Great piece, Will. I keep commenting on your heartfelt articles. That’s a good sign.
My dad is a Browns fan, I suppose, but he’s grown bitter in many ways… and the passion for the Browns that I remember at the sunday casserole football parties we had growing up, sure ain’t there anymore. I hope I don’t lose the passion… even if it means the heartbreak doesn’t hurt as much.
Great piece Will.
My dad is a Browns fan because his dad was a Browns fan and I’m a Browns fan because they were Browns fans. But like dgriff, over the years I’ve felt my dad’s cynicism towards the Browns grow. While he was a huge fan growing up, I think a large part of his fandom died when the team moved and didn’t come back when the new team arrived.
Neither of us live in NE Ohio anymore and while I pay for the Sunday Ticket to watch them, he doesn’t and so pretty much only follows them through reading about them. It’s still a bond that we share, but I’m saddened that it isn’t as strong as it once was.
Alas, that’s too bad. Another casualty of Modell’s disgusting selfishness.
Great writing! The bond between father and son is often greatly enhanced by sports. Three of my 4 sons now live out of town – one in China – but we have our love of the Browns, Indians and Cavs in common. In response to some who see that their dad’s have become somewhat bitter, reality has a way of doing that to you if you don’t try real hard to fight the urge. The realization that the teams, players, leagues, etc. have no real loyalty to the fans and that the almighty $ is the object of their devotion, can cause ones interest to diminish. I try and enjoy the games for what they are – entertainment, and not focus on the business side.
Great article Will.